So today at work the restaurant was quiet , very quiet.
I strolled around expecting a nice relaxing final day.
Suddenly – disaster struck. (no , my manager didn’t come to talk to me)
A colleague told me he needed some help with something hard difficult (get your heads out of the gutter you cr33ps)
He led me upstairs where i was greeted by what would be the cause of arm pain , shoulder pain and a rather bad neckache.
Approximately 60-75 empty beer kegs sat before me.
“we need to get these downstairs at the back. – You grab those two and ill take these two , we’ll take them to the lift otherwise it’ll be tiring”
OTHERWISE IT’LL BE TIRING?! MOTHERFUCKER THESE THINGS ARE HEAVIER THAN THE XBOX
[Previous sentence may have been an exaggeration , according to wikipedia an empty Beer keg weighs approximately 30 pounds (13.5 kg) – the xbox as we all know weighs much more than that]
I take 2 beer kegs at a time to the lift , they’re heavy enough just carrying but then when you get to the lift you have to stack them – this means setting them down and then lifting them up to approximately head height and placing them on top of other kegs. Painful.
Once the lift is full (with approximately 21 kegs) they all have to be taken downstairs , where they then need to be unstacked and restacked outside in the alley. My arms want to fall off at this point.
After loading and unloading beer kegs into the lift 3 times the alley way looked like this.
Great I thought to myself, that’s over at last.
my colleague turned to me “halfway there now. back in the lift.”
me : “oh. fuck.”
Turns out gas canisters are actually even heavier than beer kegs despite looking slimmer and smaller , i guess its something to do with all the anti-explosion stuff they have to do to it to prevent it from going kapow due to pressure.
Same thing again , only this time we load the canisters into a stolen sainsburys trolley and wheel it into the lift , sounds easier but lifting those fucking canisters to a height where you can put them into a trolley is hard work.
We did this for 2 lift rounds , with 2 trolleys each round.
The purple and green gas canisters easily weigh double the amount of one of the Beer kegs , which is really saying something.
With that finished i take 5 minutes to relax and massage my neck which has somehow been greatly affected by all of this.
The rest of the day was a fairly normal one , I had lunch as normal on a sunday although this time i thought id try some of the other stuff.
From left to right
Glass of coke , Chicken satay with peanut sauce , Sushi , Pickled horseradish , Crispy duck pancake , Noodles with just about everything i could get my hands on (includes sweet and sour chicken ,fried tofu ,mincemeat , massala somethingorother , beef in blackbean sauce , prawns)
Finally the day finished , i got myself a bowl of chocolate ice cream and sat down for a few minutes , staring around at the place ive worked at for 8 months now.
Will i miss the other staff? Maybe , a few of them were nice
Will i miss my manager or Assistant Manager? Not a chance
Will i miss being a waiter? Probably
Will i miss the money? Yes.
Meng – Now unemployed.