Machete (2010)

So… Machete is probably the closest thing we’ll ever get to a Duke Nukem film without a Duke Nukem film actually being made. (and lets face it, if it was announced, it wouldnt show its face for a good 20 years anyway)

Machete is basically a guy that doesnt give a fuck, the sort of guy who if sent on a mission of impossible odds and is shown into a big room of guns – will almost immediately go for a Machete. He walks around, doesnt give a fuck, chops peoples heads off and fucks bitches.
The plot is pretty laughable, but nobody is watching it for that, its just a pure hack and slash gorefest style film, and im quite okay with this.

Also, jessica alba has a semi-nude scene, lynsey lohan is topless for half the film and in the first 5 minutes of the film a woman pulls a mobile phone out of her snatch. Guns, blood and tits.

If you have a pair of balls, you should probably check the film out.